Demolition Man is the best movie ever... to prepare us for permanent Corona lifestyle. It thought of EVERYTHING.

Like I said in the title, the 1993 Stallone/Snipes masterpiece Demolition Man thought of everything to prepare us for living in a permanent Coronavirus lifestyle:

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• Toilet paper? Who needs handfulls of wadded paper when you can pamper your ass with the Three Seashells?
• Touchless greetings? The perfect "almost high five with a wiggle" is there for you.
• Conversation starters? Just drop a "Mellow greetings, citizen. What seems to be your boggle?" on someone.
• Restaurant choices? Why bother? Taco Bell, and only Taco Bell exists. The future winner of the Franchise Wars deserves to feed us affordable grade Q beef for eternity.
• Alternate protein source for when we can't farm cows due to quarantine? Rat burgers!
• Music? Radio stations play end to end commercial jingles but that's basically what's happening now, so...
• Random topless chicks accidentally video conferencing you while you work from home? Check!
• VR "sex" with Sandra Bullock because actually rubbing naughty bits together is icky? Double check!
• Dennis Leary dressed like Mad Max while everyone else wears fashion togas? Triple check!

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Basically perfect plan for our future society. Oh and there's frozen then defrosted bad guys, an eyeball on a pen, knitting, and some shooting, and fighting, and explosions. Go watch it.

Submitted March 28, 2020 at 11:53PM by illigal https://ift.tt/2WNZ0Eg